The Pope’s Rider

Aparently its gonna cost about £12m for The Pope to visit, surely someones having a laugh here I mean his rider would only consist of:

5 x Bottles holy water (sparkling & still)
1 x Hyundai i10 (second hand would do, no more than £500)
3 x Alter Boys for backstage entertainment
1 x Jar m&m’s (brown only)
1 x CD ‘Now thats what i call top hymns (Vol 3)’ (£2 off Brownhills market)
1 x fake Louise Foutton suitcase (probably be able to use the one from the ‘Kissing the tarmac Tour 82’ )
1 x Support act (Desmond Tutu & Cliff Richard doing a Cannon & ball skit)

you’d get the lot for a grand.